When it came to color, my preference was black.  You can’t go wrong with black.  And as for the promise of longer, fuller lashes, of course I wanted those. Hypoallergenic was a must.  Naturally, I would prefer that my brown eyes didn’t swell shut.  I’m already about as blind as a bat. And never tested on animals?  A guinea pig should only wear makeup if she wants to, and then only if she follows these same guidelines.

The only thing I forgot to consider when selecting new mascara, was whether or not it had ever been tested on crying mothers.


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